I Hear That...

There are things that you do that you just don't have to think about: breathe, look with your eyes, move your hands across a keyboard or number pad, listen with your ears, taste something good with your mouth.  Ordinarily, you just don't really think purposefully about doing these things - they come naturally, right?  So what happens when one of these things doesn't work properly?  What then?

I'm asking that question now because I have experienced some hearing loss.  I had an appointment with a specialist in Sioux Falls yesterday.  Before seeing him, I had a series of listening tests that I need to go through.  "Push the button when you hear a tone" the hearing specialist told me.  I could hear some tones and I would push the button.  Other times I sat there in that soundproof room, wondering why she wasn't sending any tones so I could push the button.  

What a dope I am, sometimes...

The hearing specialist told me that I am generally okay on the lower tones, but it really begins to be severe on the upper tones.  The doctor specialist told me the same thing.  Evidently, my problem is located in the cochlea - that portion of the inner ear that looks like a snail shell (cochlea is Greek for snail - who knew?).  The cochlea receives sound in the form of vibrations, which cause the stereocilia to move.  The stereocilia then convert these vibrations into nerve impulses which are taken up to the brain to be interpreted.  From what I could understand, this portion of the inner ear can begin to fail.  No corrective surgery will help - but hearing aids will.  

I wasn't ready to hear that.

I mean, c'mon!  I've just been through the wringer with three major surgeries in five months (which by the way, anyone of these could have been a catalyst in accelerating the hearing loss - isn't that fabulous!)  How many things can one person expect to have to deal with in one year?  

I look at that sentence and I realize how foolish I am if I really believe it.  Because I have been blessed - immeasurably blessed by God over the years.  I've walked with persons whose courage and faith makes mine seem so small.  I don't have a leg to stand on (well, that's actually not true, I have two bionic legs to stand on).  I mean that I have no business getting upset over things like this.  It's just a part of aging.  It's natural.  I'm not exempt from any of these things.  And I believe that God will always speak loudly enough for me to hear.  So, what's my problem?  Really nothing in the vast picture of life.  I'm good.  

I hear that...

Getting Back to the Ride

I haven't posted anything here since the early part of October of last year.  There are two really good reasons for this latest drought: 1) I've been dealing with recovery issues regarding the replacement of my left hip, and both left and right knees (three major surgeries in five months).  Now, I know I had time to sit down and blog a few ideas during that time, but then again, I just didn't feel like it.  I know.  Kinda strong, huh?

2) The second reason is more than likely the overriding factor in deciding not to journal anything during that time frame.  I had posted something that some persons thought was political in nature.  I might have been oversensitive to their response (goodness, I even deleted the post).  But it really bothered me that I wasn't supposed to have any opinion at all.  That's not what my faith tells me.  That isn't what I learn from scripture.  Followers of Jesus are called to be wise, discerning, not conforming to the world, but being transformed to the mind of Christ.  I was merely calling to light those things which were not any of these things.  So be it.  I guess it's time to put on my big boy pants.

I really wanted to share how difficult this process of healing from three major surgeries in five months has been.  I'm not certain if I actually gave enough time to heal adequately between each procedure (then again, the experts are telling me it takes about a year to fully heal from any one of these.)  I'm certain there was depression - I know this because I would sit at home and do nothing for long periods of time, knowing it wasn't helpful or even healthy.  One of signs of depression is the inability to complete a task.  For a while, that was me.

There was pain, but medication was there to help that along.  Yet even in this I was wary.  So much has been reported about opiates and the dangers surrounding them.  Two of the prescriptions were opiates.  I stopped taking them after a few weeks mostly because I was not about to become dependent upon them.

Therapy wasn't necessarily a highlight, but it did some good in the long run.  I would go to therapy feeling pretty good in my hip/left knee/or right knee, but would feel much more sore around those parts when I left.  Not sure that was the intended result.

I also had a very hard time sleeping.  I cannot remember the last good seven - eight hour sleep I had straight through.  Up every few hours, unable to sleep, wandering late at night, wondering late at night if I was ever going to be healthy again.  

And lastly, I missed connections.  Not able to be in the office and see people.  Not able to have my own nuclear family around me when I was recovering.  Nancy took a few days off to help me (which was very helpful).  When she needed to return to work, I'm sure she was glad to get away from her 64 year old patient who wasn't being very patient.  I did receive a lot of cards and well wishes - you have to know how much they were appreciated!  

So it was a rather tough ordeal.  I'm glad it's on the last track right now.  I'm glad I did it and it's over.  Like my daughter told me when we were in Israel on a colder than anticipated day "Suck it up, buttercup, you're from Minnesota!"  

I'm doing better.  I know I am.  Goodness, here I am blogging again.  

Thanks, Lord, for the healing you provide.