I recall a
number of years ago, I discovered that I had a bad habit. At the time I really didn't realize nor
understand that it was a bad habit. It
took my wife's wisdom to point it out to me.
Some of you may have heard this story before... one day I was going
about my regular routine getting ready for the day. I was getting cleaned up, putting on my
clothes, etc. In the middle of that
process, my wife asked me if I was going to wear the pair of socks again that I
had worn the day before. Up until that
moment, that had been my normal method of operation. I didn't really see anything wrong with it -
it was my status quo. I told her that I
was and we talked it over, she pointing out good habits and cleanliness and
sock odor and all things like that. I
told her that I hadn't really ever thought about it like that, but was fairly
certain that my socks didn't have any odor.
She said to me "You have sock issues".
I imagine she was
right. Actually, I was having issues
with changing - not just my socks.
Issues with changing my routine.
Like most people, I admit that change is hard. I don't really like changes. And I'm a person who doesn't really like
surprises. I suppose that points toward
wanting to retain some control over things in my life. Perhaps that's true. I imagine all of us would like to keep the
status quo the same.
The theme
from today's devotion from the booklet "Embracing the Uncertain" challenges us about our own status quo.
Specifically, the writer asks a question that was difficult to read:
"What if we are reluctant to hear the challenging, compelling words of
Jesus because of just how disruptive they might be to our own preferred ways of
thinking and acting?" I believe
that is very true.
But I am not
going to impose that question upon you.
I will own my own feelings on this.
I believe there are certain things that Jesus has said that I would
rather step around than face them fully.
For example, "love your enemies". I hear those words and agree with them. It's much harder to put them into practice for
the simple reason that I will go out of my way to avoid those who are my
enemies. I step around Jesus' words
thinking that if I avoid those who go against me or have targeted me (for some
reason) then everything will be fine.
As long as I
am being transparent here, I do have to search my memory banks to determine who
I perceive my enemies to be. It is a
very short list. In fact, I'm not sure
that there is anyone on that list right now... but in the past, certainly there
have been a few persons whom I haven't seen eye to eye with and I would
classify them as my enemy. My point here
is this: over the years, I've tried to follow Jesus' teachings and for the most
part I feel like I've done an admirable job.
But like all imperfect humans, I've had my moments.
In fact, in
truth, I know I still have my moments now and again. I believe my resistance to change is
definitely related to maintaining some kind of control in my life. I admit that some of the decisions I have
made were done to keep things in my life the same. When that happens, I usually gum up the
works.
During those
"I'm only human" instances, I'm ever grateful that Jesus does
envision this world as one that is filled with the possibilities of grace and
forgiveness. I need that grace and
forgiveness during those self-defining moments when I go at it alone - all by
myself.
I just need
to place the words of Jesus ahead of my own self-sustaining issues. Yes, I have issues. But I've learned throughout the years. Change sometimes takes a while. But I did change my socks this morning.
I'm getting
there.
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